Duality Trap: Emergencies

This last week my refrigerator broke down. It was rather old so I knew I would eventually be replacing it. Of course, the previous week when it had been working my pantry had been bare. So, I had gone out and bought over $100 worth of groceries, much of it seafood, and had just finished congratulating myself on my fine purchases when the next day the refrigerator died.

I watch my objective imagery very closely. I think of it as the abstract symbols of how I am creating my life. If I create a happening that is bound to get my attention, I spend a bit of time musing on how I created it and why. This time, I decided to ignore it and offered myself the justification that the refrigerator was old. Of course, it would eventually break down!

So, then my furnace refused to start. It was at this point that I became furious. The refrigerator hadn't bothered me, so now I was going to create the furnace not working? That furnace was new! It should have been working! It was still warrantied. It had no excuse for creating this emergency situation and I wholeheartedly resented it.

Just because we are masters of our reality and understand that we create our reality does not mean that we have learned to appreciate every instance of our creations! Nor that we are always paying attention! I have been working on this aspect of appreciation for quite some time but I was telling myself: "I'm tired and I've been doing this for a long time. So, now I feel like being mad." So, I got mad.

I didn't pay attention to the fact that time paid a key role in the manifestation of my stress. The creations were all about time, a subject I was keenly exploring at the time with a friend. Clearly, if time didn't exist, the food would not be subejct to spoilage because it would not age. Clearly, I would not be tired having practiced appreciation for quite some time because I couldn't experience a lack of energy or motivation in a space where time was not an issue. And clearly, the irritation would not have gotten to the point of anger if time hadn't marched on leaving me cold and hungry.

It appeared to me at the time of these happenings, that the longer it took to fix something the more unacceptable it became. Instead of accepting the situation, I became increasingly aggravated. It became apparent to me that time had not changed a single thing about my reality. I had changed my reality through my perception of time. Time is my enemy, in emergency situations. That's what I believe. Time is unchangeable and it just runs away without letting me catch up. I loose my breath. I loose my cool! Literally, I created that by shutting down my refrigerator! And then, I went one step further and decided not to let things heat up as well. In imagery, I had stopped time. Obviously, I was desiring to slow down.

It was interesting to me that this occurred as I have taken on a variety of extra work and projects. I have begun to race away without realizing that I actually prefer a very quiet and calm life. I became motivated by this experience to look into ways people in the past had dealt with the issue of food spoilage and I found information on root cellars. From there, I explored other areas of home construction and maintenance, and issue that has been plaguing me this last year, and realized that I no longer align with a modern way of life. I want an earth-friendly and slower pace in my life. I want a sane life where I create a natural flow in time for my desires instead of cultural time creating demands on me. This was definitely something worth paying attention to and creating consciously. I could now appreciate the creation of my emergencies and see them what they truly represent: a shift in consciousness and an expression of my beliefs about time. This gives me the opportunity to address those beliefs and through acceptance neutralize their effect on me. It also brings me back to a point of power where I realize that I create time and I change my reality through my perception of it.